Friday, April 19, 2013

Blog // Please Look After Mother (My thoughts)

This is not a book review.  This has something to do with the realizations I had when I read the novel.


This is only my OPINION though.

Please Look after Mother is one of the best eye opening novel. It talks about everything… from compassion, life, death, love, regret, past, present, future. 

The author wanted her readers to fully understand what she wanted to emphasize. According to her… it’s COMPASSION. She used “Mother” as the specific medium to actually express her thoughts and opinions.

“How far back does one’s memory of someone go?” ... memories will remain inside the heart even if they fade in our mind.

“There are moments one revisits after something happens, especially after something bad happens. Moments in which one thinks, I shouldn’t have done that.” This passage talks about regret. In the novel… most of the characters revisited their memories with “Mother” and all of them had regrets that they wanted to change if they were given the chance.

“If there were no sea between you and me there wouldn’t be this painful goodbye…” Goodbye is a beautiful pain. It ends something but it also a sign of a new beginning. 

“Most of the things in the world are not unexpected if one thinks carefully about them. Even something one would call unusual – if one thinks about it, it’s really just a thing that was supposed to happen.”

“How could you only do what you like? There are things you have to do whether you like it or not.” Have you ever thought if your “Mother” actually likes cooking, doing the laundry, cleaning the house, etc? Do you think that they like what they do? Do they do these chores because they want to or because it’s their obligation to us; their children, husband, mother in law, sister in law, brother in law, niece, nephew? They do these things because they NEED them to do it. Sometimes it is not the matter of LIKING what you are doing… it is a matter of OBLIGATION. 

“How can you live without trusting people there are more people who are good than people who are bad?”

“Now I feel like I could say anything and everything but there’s nobody to listen to me.” Regret. The “Father” regretted that he didn’t treat his wife; the “Mother” kindly. He wasn't able to show her kindness.  He had all the time in the world to talk to her and treat his wife passionately and kindly but he wasn't able to.  He let her suffer alone because he didn’t want to listen to her words. He didn’t know that she was in pain and that she needed someone to lean on. That is the duty of a husband towards his wife but he wasn’t able to fulfill his duties to her.

“My mother raised me until now, and all that’s happened is a role reversal – it’s only fair.” When we were still young, our mother sacrifices lots of things… from her sleep to her freedom. I think it’s only fair to take care of our parents when the time comes when they need us. This is PAYBACK time. Although we are not oblige to do this but think of how much they gave us… because of them… we are here right now. 

The “Mother” in the novel had a huge impact on me and I can actually say that I finally realized how hard it is being a “Wife” and “Mother”. I didn’t know that it is the toughest job on earth. The Mother in Shin’s novel experienced a lot of things and she is the very symbol of “Sacrifice”. She did everything she can to raise her children, to support her husband, to follow her sister in law and to give everything they needed amidst the unkind way they treated her…even if that means throwing away her own dreams. Her children’s dream became her dreams. She unconsciously shared their dreams and forced herself to believe that it was her dream too. She suffered a lot in the novel and while reading it, I felt her pain, her sadness, the remorse, her wish to “Please look after me…”. She was silently pleading.

And then when she went missing…  That was the start of the “Revisiting” process wherein everybody reminisced the past they had of her. They came to a realization that the “Mother” they knew was not just a “Mother” but as well as a woman who had needs and wanted to be taken care of. 

Although they live in a world where everything is possible… they felt the hopelessness when “Mother” went missing. They have the money, luxury, fame but these things became part of nothingness when they can’t do anything to find “Mother”. 

Although the novel starts with “It’s been one week since Mother went missing”… I saw the process of her disappearance in the novel.  

There are things in this world that are important to us and we unconsciously take them for granted. When they’re gone, that’s the only time we realize how important they are. Then, come regret and sorrow. No matter how busy our life is… try to stop for a little while and savor what we have instead of worrying what we don’t have. 

Advice:


1. Say what’s in your mind before it’s too late. Time is gold. You’ll never know how long the important people in your life can stay beside you.

2. Appreciate things around you. Savor them and focus with “NOW”
Past, Present and Future are mixture. What happened in the past is what you are now and what you are now will affect your future. Do the things that you want to do. Don’t wait for the time where you will say “I should have done that.” 

3. Respect your PARENTS. Bear in your mind their sacrifices.

4. Be open-minded. You are not the only person who has emotions. People around you are human too. Do not think that you are the only one who’s capable of feeling the pain and sorrow.


 Have a good day friends.

Things that made me happy:
> New Manga series that I am reading right now. Super hilarious.
> Finally I'm in page 250... "Don Quixote" book.
> Thank God! My Grandmother is not having some kind of mood imbalance. 
> Cold Water. Lately... the weather here in the Philippines is becoming more and more HORRIBLE.
> A new day
> That I am still ALIVE